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Been a while since I have done one of these.
To be elligible you must be one of the 571 watchers I have now, any new ones after this journal is posted cannot enter.

All you must do is comment on this journal and I will assign a number. After a month I will use an RNG to pick a winner.

If enough people enter there may be a bonus giveaway.

Have a good day everyone.

Screenshot-www.random.org-2018.03.23-23-10-46 by SoMA-To-FoRM
The number generator chose number 10 as the winner, so ElskaFox gets $50

Now there is a bonus drawing for the remaining 22 people that entered. One week from today I will do another drawing, but this time for $25

I had to scrap the second drawing due to a surprise $400 tuition fee for school. Sorry everyone ^^;
The next time I do a giveaway I'll make it worth it.
Well... Since I missed last year's, I figure I'll go to this years Bronycon.

If anyone wants to get a room together or something let me know. Or if someone already has arrangements and has room for one more that's cool too.
I've been wanting to get a picture of a home interior that I dreamt of a while back. 

It's extremely baroque, and I would love to have a picture of it to be able to say "I dreamt of this home one time."

And it's not an impossible design either. Just very unconventional and unique.

If anyone can do these kinds of drawings, let me know please.
Or if you know someone that can, please point me to them.
Update: I got word that the individual has been officially banned. I couldn't be any more pleased with the news. To those going, have a fun and safe con. 

There is someone that will be attending that is a self-described pedophile and zoophile that will be attending there, and despite the con staff being told of his intent to attend, they do not seem to be doing much to prevent him coming. 
This person goes by the name Rome Silvanus, and he will be there. The con staff has said that they want to ban him but cannot without his real name.

He has videos online of himself screwing horses and other animals, and he's just all around wrong. He even revels in the fact that he is terrible and uses the negative attention to boost his ego.
If you want proof of the con staff being aware then here is a screenshot I was given a few weeks ago. They acknowledge that they have seen some of the disgusting things he has on the net.
1 by SoMA-To-FoRM

The blurred part is there to protect the identity of the person that sent me this. 
It is basically them joking about this person not being allowed to bring underage girls to the room.
Which then he replied "Then I will bring underage boys instead."

I find it hilarious that this is making its rounds now. 
Long story short, someone I used to be friends with befriended this pedo loser, and I wasn't happy about it. He started to associate with them and then they just became all-around toxic. So I burned that bridge.
Now this person is a guest of honor at Nightmare Nights Dallas, and he has invited Rome to the con so they can do dumb shit to laugh at him for.

I find this disgusting, and dangerous to the kids attending the con. If you are a guest of honor to a con, then treat the con staff with HONOR and grace them with your presence. Don't abuse their generosity and invite some scumbag like that. 
And that's all I have to say.


If you are going, be on the lookout for this guy, and stay away.
Spread the word please. I don't want this guy around my friends at the con or any kids that will be attending.
Well, I've completed enough of my school now to be considered a sophomore in college. It's the furthest I've ever gotten so far, all my past endeavors with college fell flat shortly after starting. 

I still have a 3.9 GPA and made Dean's list 4 times. And now I have A+ certification, so I can potentially quit my retail job and work as a computer technician somewhere in town. 

Can't wait to finish honestly... I want some new high paying work at this point
  • Listening to: Casimir Pulaski Day
  • Watching: Into the Wild
This applies to only my current watchers. My count is at 523, so only these ones are elligible.

A commission of mine was refunded, so I'm going to make it a giveaway.

To be put in the drawing pool to possibly win it, just comment on this journal. 
In 3 weeks I'll pick a winner.

As for Bronycon, I lost my carpooling group so I don't know if I can make it anymore. I want to, but I'm also down a room now. If anyone has a room that I could share that'd help out. I just need to find a cheap flight in that case.
  • Listening to: Casimir Pulaski Day
  • Watching: Into the Wild
I'm going to reconsider Bronycon this year only. Make it the very last con I attend.
Since Babscon is kinda a fringe pony con, one that doesn't get as many attendees as BC, then it would be unfair to those few people that wanted to see me at Bronycon this year.

I have a $100 flight voucher, and it would be too good to waste by not going anywhere with it. 

But as long as I can eat dinner without being forgotten or left behind while the rest go eat, then I will attend BC all three days. 

...I just hope people won't let me down like they usually do...
  • Listening to: Casimir Pulaski Day
  • Watching: Into the Wild
The way everything is just a breeze now has really weighed on me for a few days.

School is way easier than I thought it would be, and makes my past attempts at college look embarrassing... 
I was in and out of school for the past 5 years, because anxiety and other things weighed me down. But now it's just so simple that I laugh at that whole experience. 

I just hope that things don't go all crashing down in one day like they have in the past. 

Now with socially useless conventions out of my future plans I will be going places. The first on my list will be Flathead Lake in Montana. A glacial lake filled with Crystal clear water, as it has no oxygen in it. Therefore, nothing lives in it. After that, the grand canyon. Other places I'll figure out later.

At the rate things are going now though, I should be right where I want to be in just a few years.
Which is somewhere way far away from anyone I know already. Someplace where I can consign myself away to living the life of a Crumb. 
It may sound odd... But I always imagined myself being a reclusive and isolated person when I was younger. 

And when I was stuck in my rut over the past few years, I strayed from that image greatly. I thought I wanted to get a job somewhere and work enough to where I could create something that everyone would love to be a part of. I wanted to be a part of something bigger than just myself and make my mark on the world.

But now, after recovering and getting back to school, I've found that the old interpretation has resurfaced...

I still want to make something that will leave my mark on the world now, and I already know exactly what it is I'm going to do... 
Just that when it's done, I don't want anyone knowing it was I that created it and set it into motion...

I guess it's kinda like Dr. Seuss. He loved kids and others, but he was so afraid of being around them because what they imagined him to be and what he actually was would have disappointed them.

Blah blah blah... I'm ranting and raving about my personal nonsense. No one will really question anything, or ask anything about what the hell I mean. 
... Things have just been rough, and a bit turbulent lately, and this is my way of dealing with it.
  • Listening to: Casimir Pulaski Day
  • Watching: Into the Wild
I've grown to feel so out of place at them now. And it just feels like a waste of money that I go to them and don't do anything besides scour the vendors for stuff.

I like going to meet friends at them of course, but even that feels weird now. 
It feels like people somehow get super eager to see me in person, then somehow I come off as stale or disappointing, or the other online first impression still has them convinced on other things.

I've spent a lot of time thinking of things, internal things. 
And I realize maybe I'm not the most memorable character that people think of, so it's lead me to think that going to cons would spare me the annoyance of having someone be ecstatic to meet me, and then throw me to the back of the line once I'm gone. 

It's kinda time for that to happen too I guess. 
Time to move on from certain things and find myself, if there's anything to find there. If I'm honest I always feel like I'm piecing together a jigsaw of what I am, and no matter what it never comes together. Whether it be pieces missing from it, or a faulty image I have of myself, I don't know just yet.

School is probably my biggest goal at the moment now. And conventions, I don't care much for them anymore.
I'll plan trips to new places on my own now, and maybe find pieces of myself on any travels I take.

Sorry to really be sappy or depressing here, it's been a long time since I've vented anything. 
And I'm also sorry to anyone that was hoping to see me at future cons. Bronycon isn't on my plans this year any longer. It will take some serious convincing to get me back on board with that.

But anyways, this is life. I've got myself to figure out, that's what I'll be doing from now on.
  • Listening to: Casimir Pulaski Day
  • Watching: Into the Wild
It is finally time to announce that since I just hit 500 watchers.

Unfortunately, due to the whole car incident, I will have to delay the contest for a month or two until I can rebuild the old engine and then sell it off as a remanufactured one. 
The contests will also be split regarding when they are done too. 

I will post a poll on which one should be done first, the art or writing one. And then once I have the money back to hold the contest, I will post an announcement and then give the critical details.

Here are the details I have for each contest now:
500 Watcher Contest DetailsNot there yet, but I want to go ahead and lay out the groundwork of how it will work.
There will be two seperate contests, one for writing and one for artwork. 
Each contest will have 2 prizes. A grand prize of $100, and the runner up will get a commission from someone. I've got to work out the latter prizes with someone.
The topic will be with Silent Flight on both contests.
For artwork the focus will be a bit more broad than the writing contest.
Now, in the end that's two people that'll get $100 each, and two other runner ups will get a picture from someone.
Because I don't believe in getting things without giving back there will also be a participation gift for anyone that enters. I'll have to work that out somehow. It'll likely be a point giveaway, so if anyone could donate points to ease my wallet with that it would help a lot.
Which this is also the reason it's not Constance and AJ. I don't want a ton of ship art when most of the people making it won't get anything in return

Make note that journal is a few months old. The final journal concerning everything will be posted after multiple announcements leading up to it.

I hope I didn't disappoint anyone. Life happened quick last month, and I'm a bit behind financially. 
But it will happen soon enough.

Thanks for the watches everybody ^^
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: Into the Wild
Those two are on the schedule for this year.
But I admit I'm a bit on the fence about going to them at this point.

I want to go to see friends and hang out with people, but there's also a few people I'd rather not run into ever again.
One in particular, was a friend who threw me under because I couldn't play an online game up to his standard, and pretty much called me stupid because of a small mistake I made in game... 
There are others I won't mention here.

Of course the biggest reason I want to go overall would be the trip back to Big Sur. When I went last year I was amazed with the sights, so I want to go back to it again.
I'll just have to see how I feel about it as it gets closer. That trip is already paid for anyways.

On the more personal side of things, eh, its been a little rough here lately.
Work and school are the drain as usual, but the extra car work has been extra taxing. Got to replace the whole engine on it.
So it is around that time that I need a weekend off or a small trip for myself to regain my composure, and I'm not sure when I'll get that break.

All around bleh... There's not much more I can say.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: Into the Wild
I got tagged by Topas-Art to give 10 facts about my character/characters

So why not do 5 each, five for Constance, and five for Silent Flight.

Constance Everheart
Who Knows What Could be in This Hat by SoMA-To-FoRM

1. Constance isn't really an OC that I consciously designed. He was the appearance I took in pony dreams that I had years back. I never had a cutie mark in them, I just know I was a pale earth pony with blue eyes and a blue mane. It's kinda been a while since I've had a pony dream, I think since my life turned around they stopped becoming as common as they were. They were always a massive relief when they happened.

2. His cutie mark is actually representative of a fruit. Although not a tangible one. The mark is a sigil that represents the facets of one fruit in particular, but I won't mention it here. You'll have to find out on your own. Ask me and I'll give you hints =p

3. He grew up in an isolated village on the edge of the everfree forest. The village itself was very reclusive, keeping out of other town's and city's affairs. The inhabitants were quite xenophobic about ponies on the outside, and leaving it was highly frowned upon. Constance didn't like being forbidden from leaving it, so he left it one day after an argument with his family.

4. Silent Flight convinced him that the world outside the village wasn't all that bad as everyone else had told him, and without interaction with Silent he never would have left. After Constance's departure, Silent made sure that Constance never ran into any extreme trouble. Once Constance had arrived in Ponyville, Silent helped build Constance's esteem up to where he could go and find a job. Eventually he ended up doing contractor work for a business. 

5. Anxiety plagues Constance to no end. He's easily upset by things going wrong, but when he has a reason to be happy he can light up the world around him. He's very kind and compassionate but knows he cannot save everything that he wants to. This also leaves him open to manipulation from others, a mistake he constantly has to deal with. He met AJ at a party that he was invited to by a friend, with him being anxious he didn't feel like dancing, so he went outside. AJ was already there, and that's how they met.

Silent Flight
With Wings Like These by SoMA-To-FoRM

1. Silent Flight is a hippogriff based off the color scheme of a barn owl. They're my favorite birds, so I wanted to design a character themed off of one. Just like an owl, he possesses a strong sense of hearing, and can fly in virtual silence. 

2. He had a lover years ago, a unicorn mare named "Valencia Equi" (If you can spot the wordplay you get a cookie). She specialized in healing and glamor magic. She happened upon Silent one day while he was asleep in a tree, thought he was handsome. So she cast a glamor on herself to take the appearance of a hippogriff to get close to him. Silent is usually very reserved, but Valencia's personality is like a perfect counter to his and could get him to open up easily. Of course Silent found out that she was just a unicorn disguised as a hippogriff, but he had already opened up to her and made himself vulnerable, so he brought himself to be able to trust her. They bonded over the course of a few months. She was a balance to his life which he has mostly lived alone apart from growing up with his family. But one day Valencia decided she wanted to surprise Silent by permanently taking the appearance of a hippogriff. Her spell was a powerful one, and it did not work according to her plan. It left her in an unrecognizable form, injured and unable to call for help she passed away after a few hours in the state she got herself in. Silent found her eventually, and well, this part could go on for a while. You get the idea.

3. His mask is a keepsake, it is made from Valencia's ashes. It's his way of always having her around even when she is gone.

4. After a period of grieving, Silent joined a branch of the Royal Guard whose jobs were centered around gathering intel and scouting. Later he would move forward in the ranks to where he would be a spy for tasks given by his superiors. It was through his scouting missions that he discovered the village that Constance was from. He reported the village as very isolated, with orchards of white apples and ponds where the fish would glow in the dark. Curiosity brought him back to the orchard full of white apples one night where he met Constance. It was there that Constance learned of the world outside his village. 

5. Being a spy and a part of the Royal Guard, the job does come with some extreme action. Silent never wants to bring death upon another, but he realizes that some jobs may require it. Instead of outright killing, he will usually injure his target and extract them from the location and back to home base. He could be a ruthlessly efficient killer but chooses not to become so.

________________________________________________________________________

Both of my OC's are pretty much projections of my personality over the years. 
Constance is how I was back in the broken days when my head was full of turmoil and I was just downright sad all the time.

Silent is how I have become after moving on from past tragedies and mishaps. 

Anyways, thats about all I have to say about them. Hopefully someone finds them interesting.
Won't be tagging anyone. If you wanna do this just steal it and tag me in it.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
Not there yet, but I want to go ahead and lay out the groundwork of how it will work.

There will be two seperate contests, one for writing and one for artwork. 

Each contest will have 2 prizes. A grand prize of $100, and the runner up will get a commission from someone. I've got to work out the latter prizes with someone.

The topic will be with Silent Flight on both contests.
For artwork the focus will be a bit more broad than the writing contest.

Now, in the end that's two people that'll get $100 each, and two other runner ups will get a picture from someone.

Because I don't believe in getting things without giving back there will also be a participation gift for anyone that enters. I'll have to work that out somehow. It'll likely be a point giveaway, so if anyone could donate points to ease my wallet with that it would help a lot.
Which this is also the reason it's not Constance and AJ. I don't want a ton of ship art when most of the people making it won't get anything in return. 

The contest won't start until I get 500 watchers, that could hit any time. 
And the deadline will be a good while, so I can get things organized for when it's done.

Rules:
Everyone is elligible to enter, watcher or not.

No erotic or explicit NSFW content will be accepted, or tolerated. Minor blood and other things are okay, intense gore will not be okay.




Thanks everybody
Looking forward to reaching that point.
Share this journal anywhere if you'd like, more participants the better.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
So that finally happened

Here's the scoop
$25 PayPal credit

One person gets it.

This Thursday I will post a status that has the info to enter it.
Will be drawn on New Years

And the only ones eligible are the 405 watchers that I currently have.

Next giveaway will be at 500, but that will be a contest with Silent Flight.

Stay frosty

  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon

Its not the end of the world my goodness.

I get that a lot of people are upset, but this does not warrant such malicious conduct.

There's a ton of incredible deception going around about "What will happen"
So here's a bit of a disclaimer....

He cannot overturn the supreme court ruling, meaning there is no need to worry about gay rights or trans rights.
This morning the pro-life stance he took has disappeared from his campaign website, indicating that he might flip on what he said he would do before.
As far as NATO and other stuff goes, we have yet to see any of his plans hatch yet.
Hillary herself said this morning too that we owe him an open mind, and that's a bit hard to accept, even for me.
I'm not going to stoop to the level that everyone paints Trump at and spew death threats and lies about whats coming.

Now is not the time to further the divide among ourselves, we need each other now more than ever.
So please, calm it down and lets regain our wits. 

Positive Apple Vibes by HigglyTownHero
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
Been a while since I've done this

:iconsilentwulv:
If you aren't watching her by now, I don't know what you're doing with your life.

:iconrosewend:
I met her in a Picarto livestream one time and found out we live only a few miles away from each other.
She's really cool.

:iconmr-tiaa:
One of the most creative artists I've ever had the opportunity of commissioning. 
He's surprised me with his ideas multiple times now.

:iconserenityscratch:
Super fluffy style, and also super adorable.
Very sweet artist too 

:iconplumpig:
Great artist, and even better than she gives herself credit for.

:iconlocksto:
There's no explanation needed. She's a terrific artist.

:icontangomangofandango:
Fun to talk to. Even more fun to participate in his livestreams.

:iconappledew:
She's the one that made my SIlent Flight plushie. If anyone ever wants a custom plushie for a good price, I highly suggest watching her and keeping an eye out for her plush commissions.


Thats all for now.
I'll likely do another one of these in a month or two.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
So today was the last day of my first term of school. The next one starts in two weeks.
All I can really say about it is that it's been very gratifying to finally stretch my mind. I idled too much over the years and let it stagnate.

I did very well for my first term. My first paper I turned in came back the other day, 150 out of 150.
And I felt a bit of an unfamiliar feeling with that. 
It felt a little good to pass something like that. 

The unfamiliarity of the sensation possibly comes from.the fact that I never really have felt proud of anything I've ever done in my life. Must be a part of the old sickness I had. There's been a fair craving for new knowledge along with this as well.

It feels rewarding to do good now and that's all I care about. I feel like this will be the final run with college, and I'll make it the whole way to get a degree. Then finally be able to get started on some old ideas and plans. 

A couple nights ago I had an interesting dream though.
In it I was living in my own in Hawaii of all places, but I also had an eye patch and I was very short-sighted. I had an argument with a certain family member in it, and it wasn't a pretty conversation. After hanging up with it I felt petty. Then decided to leave for Honolulu. I can't remember anything beyond that. 

I think that the dream itself though was a way of me subconsciously telling myself that I've been a bit too narrow with some things. What those are I have yet to deduce. Of course that's assuming that my interpretation is valid.

All that leads me to my evaluation of this year. 
It's been a lot better than previous years. I've moved forward a ton, and I still am pressing on.
That's not to say it's been perfect.

I notice some internal problems still brewing as hot as they were in the sick years. Things like me being envious of people that have others to do things with and lean on, and hypocritically, I don't trust people enough to break out of the cycle. So that's my problem to figure out, somehow...
I'm still a socially inept moron in so many ways, but I've gotten better I think. 

At the end I'm just once again glad to say I feel fine on the inside. Depression could have done me in... But I rose from it and only let it make me better.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
It ended up being a better day then I expected.

Went go cart racing with some friends early in the day then went and had dinner with family and 2 friends.

And after that had an unplanned party where at my place with Rosewend and ZanciiKitty 


Thanks again everybody for the good wishes, they definitely made it better ^^
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
  • Playing: Witcher 3
Well, its finally time for that.
But there's a bonus, I'll also be drawing for a $15 recipient.

So now, one person gets $30, another gets $15

Winner of the $30 is...

Screenshot-www.random.org 2016-09-07 16-29-05 by SoMA-To-FoRM
Rosewend 

And the $15 grab goes to...
Screenshot-www.random.org 2016-09-07 16-31-25 by SoMA-To-FoRM
CSOX 

This Friday after I get home from work and cash my paychecks I will send out the money via paypal.
Thanks everybody, see you on the next giveaway I do.
  • Listening to: To be Alone With You
  • Watching: the Man on the Moon
  • Playing: Witcher 3